After being on Ibiza for a bit more than 6 months now, things are starting to settle down. I found a new job, which came with a beautiful place to live and I could still work at my old job which came with a car. So I have everything: a house, a car, 2 lovely jobs, still some time for my own business and enough money to get by. You’d think that I would be happy to stay like this for a while (me too!). But just when everything started to settle down I felt that I needed to move again. The same strong pull that guided me to go to Ibiza now is guiding me to move away from here – and I decided to listen, again. Not because it is the easiest option, definitely not, but because I feel it will bring me more joy. Not that I’m not happy here, because I am, but I feel this inner calling to go somehwere else. Where I’m going and what I’ll be doing? I don’t know yet… I know for now I’m moving back to Holland, but I think that will only be temporarily. I don’t have a clue what’s next yet, but I felt I needed to make this decision based on my intuition and THEN the next step will be clear. So I’m taking a leap of faith again and I jump!!

For lots of people my decision came as a big surprise and I have to say I was quite shocked when I felt the urge to move again as well. But ignoring it wasn’t helping me in any way, it only made me feel more and more uncomfortable. Not knowing what I’ll do next scares me and leaving Ibiza makes me sad, but still I know it is the right thing to do. I am following my heart, I’m following my intuition and I know only good things can happen when you do that. Eventhough it might seem that I’m moving from left to right, from front to back and up and down, I know I am on the right path. After someone said to me that I keep changing my mind, I remember something I watched a while ago, which for me explains perfectly the path I’m following. This is the part what explains it best I think (I did leave some bits out, for the complete text or video go to www.trinfinityacademy.com):

“You’ve heard the statement many times I’m sure: follow your heart, follow your bliss, follow your excitement, follow your joy. But why is that a good thing to do? Why is that a wise, smart, empowering, aligned thing to do? Well, as we’ve explained and explored in previous lessons, it is because the emotional body functions as a guide. Joy, bliss, ecstasy, excitement, inspiration—all these qualities we feel good about—feel good precisely because they’re guiding us into more of the truth of who are.
(…)
People find it hard to follow their joy consistently. Sure, they can do it for a moment, but to consistently act on their joy—to consistently choose their bliss and to express it and act it out, to choose the things in life that represent that state of bliss—seems to be a hard thing to do consistently, because people fall into little mind traps of lack.
One major trap is that the path of their joy doesn’t seem to go anywhere linearly. When I start acting on my joy, what I notice is the more I do that, the more erratic my life becomes, the more chaotic, in a sense. This is not actually the case, but to the linear-based, conditioned, physical mind it seems like the path is going off in all kinds of directions—left, right, up, or backwards and even going down.
(…)
From our physical mind’s point of view, our linear point of view, it may seem like it’s all over the place. But if we think outside of the box for a moment; if we think in higher dimensional ways of seeing things, then it may actually seem to be like a straight tunnel, straight into the light, straight into your goal, straight into your purpose, straight into your theme, straight into who you truly are.”
*Bentinho Massaro, Trinfinity Academy, lesson 4 ‘Follow the breadcrumb trail of excitement’

Reading this again helped me to feel more secure of my choice, because I know I made this choice based on my intuition, following my joy. So eventhough it’s difficult sometimes and it’s scary not knowing what’s next, I am following it. And although it might look as I’m all over the place, I know I’m going in a straight line to get to know myself even better and better!

I am ready for the next step!!

PS: for the people back home, April 10 I’ll be back in Holland again!

Photocredits: https://thehumangallerynyc.wordpress.com/category/dance/